


Blindly in Love

by artimusdin



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Crack, Gen, I'd apologize but I'm not in the least bit sorry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-10
Updated: 2013-10-10
Packaged: 2017-12-29 00:09:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/998534
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artimusdin/pseuds/artimusdin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Product of an avengerskink prompt: This is getting ridiculous: Fury now knows that even Hydra goons have a betting pool about his two agents, and it's time for something drastic!<br/>http://avengerkink.livejournal.com/17385.html?thread=39401193#t39410665</p>
            </blockquote>





	Blindly in Love

"Director Fury, we... might have a slight problem here."

"What the hell is it now?!"

"Our techs intercepted a HYDRA communication while out in the field, sir. Turns out, it concerns two of ours, sir. Agent Barton and... Well."

"Don't you dare say 'Agents Barton and Romanoff'. There aren't enough hours in the day to take care of that kind of problem right now."

"No sir, it's not. It's Agents Barton and Coulson. Well. Here. Just read it."

"... ..."

"Yes sir. I know sir. It's been verified. It's not a fake."

"What the ever living fuck. Are we some sort of entertainment service for the world now? Is that what we are?"

"What... should we do about it sir?"

"Get Sitwell and Romanoff in here, we've got some planning to do."

 

* * *

 

"Director Fury? There's, uh, another communication sir. Addressed to you. From Hydra?"

"Hand it over."

"... ..."

".... huh. Alright then."

"Director..?"

"Yes? Don't you have something else to do?"

".... yessir."

 

* * *

 

 

"Another one sir."

"You're kidding me."

"No sir. Here."

"... you've got to be fuckin' kidding me. Get Agent Maye!"

"Uh, sir? She's stuck in a dead zone in South America with Agent Coulson, sir."

"You think I don't know that? Get her on the fucking phone!"

"I'll go talk to the tech people, then."

"Goddamned motherfucking HYDRA..."

 

* * *

 

 

"Really? I appreciate the fact that you got shit done, really I do, but did your team really have to total four vehicles, a plane, and a motorcycle in the process?"

"It seemed like a good idea at the time, sir."

"A 'good idea', huh? And did this 'good idea' work out?"

".... the objective was achieved, yes."

"There was a hesitation there Coulson. Why was there a hesitation?"

"In hindsight, I don't think I would put Agent Ward on the same team as Agents Barton and Romanoff again."

"... ..."

"Apparently Agent Ward's people skills are worse than Barton's was when he joined up."

"I didn't realize that was possible."

"I didn't either."

 

* * *

 

 

"Coulson! Glad you could make it."

"Why are there are flowers with my name on them at the front desk."

"And..?"

"The card that came with them says 'Congrats on finally pulling your heads from your respective asses.'..."

"I'm still failing to see why this should mean anything to me...."

"... and it's signed 'Best of luck, Hydra. PS: Thanks, I always wanted a new boat - George'. Sir, is there something you'd like to tell me?"

"Just that Agent Romanoff owes you something big, after the pot you won her with that stunt of yours a few days ago."

"... what."

"I'm sorry, did you think we wouldn't notice? Or were you under the impression that you were being sneaky about your 'secret crush' on Barton. Because if so, you failed. You failed miserably."

"... ..."

"Of course, Agent Barton wasn't much better. For a man that can see as spectacularly as he can, the man's damned blind when it comes to himself."

"... is that smirk really necessary sir?"

"Yes. Yes it is. Do you know how utterly frustrating it was to watch you two dance around each other for all these years?"

"I imagine less so than to be a participant in that dance."

"well, you're wrong."

"... so, is there a reason you called me in today, Director?"

"Heh. Your team has the week off. Neither will I be calling Agent Barton in."

"... thank you Director."

"Go."

"Oh, and Director? The bar's restocked. Stark added a few extras."

"Good. Wait, what? Coulson, that best be a joke. COULSON. STARK BETTER NOT KNOW YET."


End file.
